Nelson Piquet Jr Gives Vivid Account of 'Crashgate'

There are few instances in Formula One that have the ability to to shape a fans view of the sport. 2008 Singapore Grand Prix, lap 14, turn 17 (chicane), Nelson Piquet Jr crashed his Renault R28 into the wall necessitating a safety car deployment.

It was nearly a year later before Nelson Piquet Jr spoke.

According to the Brazilian, director of engineering Pat Symonds approached him after he and team-mate Fernando Alonso had poor qualifying sessions.

"'Look, both cars are at the back of the grid,' he told me. 'We are in a situation where we are not going to get anywhere in this race unless something extraordinary happens.'" [Team boss Flavio] Briatore agreed, saying it would be "a disaster for the team" unless something extraordinary happened.

"I just sat there listening because I couldn't figure out where this was going," Piquet said. "They were both very fidgety and the situation was incredibly tense. I don't think I had said a word by this point. It was only after five minutes that Flavio made his pitch. 'Look, the only way we can benefit in any way out here is by getting a safety car on the course at the right moment,' he said.

"I just sat there, looking at them. They both reminded me of what had happened in Germany when someone had crashed just after I had pitted and I came second in the race. 'Do you want to help the team?' Flavio said. 'If you crash at the right moment, it could change everything.'"

Piquet then went into detail about how Briatore put him under pressure to perform and always "barked" orders before giving a detailed account of events before and during the crash.

"They wanted the safety car on lap 14," he added. "It actually felt good to agree to do something for the team after all the criticism I had taken. I did not even consider the morality of it.

"As the laps ticked by, I knew what was coming, but it was difficult to believe what I was going to do. I was almost more nervous of messing it up for the team than for my own safety.

"I was so scared, I could hardly breathe. I was straining my eyes to see the board each time I completed the circuit so I would know which lap I was on, but it was dark out there and I could hardly see a thing.

"I screamed into the radio again and again, 'What lap are we in? What lap are we in?' They confirmed the lap and I began to brace myself because I knew what I was about to do - even if I could not believe I was going to do it.

"I came around the chicane on lap 14 and I could feel my stomach tighten. I was incredibly scared, it was like a dream. I touched the rear wheel on the wall and then stepped on the throttle to crash into the other wall. I felt no pain on impact, but the adrenalin was pumping. I felt in control of the car throughout the crash."

The safety car was immediately deployed and Alonso, who made his crucial pit stop two laps earlier, went on to win the race.

All Piquet got for his "efforts" was a "tap on the back" and "thanks" from his team principal Briatore. The Brazilian held onto his seat for the 2009 season, but was eventually dropped by Renault in the middle of the year. Not long after allegations surfaced in the media that he crashed deliberately. The FIA launched an inquiry and the rest, as they say, was history.

Piquet admits he wanted to get back at Briatore and also "apologised unreservedly" for what he did. "If I am being honest, I think I was motivated more by anger against Flavio than by a desire for a clean conscience," he said.

"Looking back, it seems like a lifetime ago, but I know I will never fully escape from its shadow," he continued. "I apologise unreservedly for what I did. I just hope people will understand the pressures I was under. It is no excuse, but I was a deeply unhappy person. I am a stronger man today. If the question was asked again, I am sure I would have the strength to say no."

FIA banned Flavio Briatore and Pat Symonds from motor sports in September 2009 for allegedly ordering Piquet Jr. to crash his car to help his teammate.

Renault escaped severe punishment from FIA, receiving only a suspended ban from F1. The F1 governing body is appealing this year's ruling by a French court to overturn Briatore's lifetime suspension.

"These serious allegations contained in the press release were wholly untrue and unfounded, and we withdraw them unequivocally," Renault said in a statement. "We would like to apologize unreservedly to Mr. Piquet Jr. and his father for the distress and embarrassment caused as a result.

"As a mark of the sincerity of our apology and regret, we have agreed to pay them a substantial amount of damages for libel as well as their costs, and have undertaken not to repeat these allegations at any time in the future."

After reading through Piquet Jr.'s account of what happened, to be able to know exactly what was going through his mind during those laps, it sends shivers down your spine.  You see a crash on circuit and think, hope, pray that the driver is ok.  How loyal is a driver that will subject himself to that world of possibilities, of 'what if's'?